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Battlefield: Comic #4, 'Unsafe Territory'

 
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Clonecommando007
New Clone on the Block


Joined: 13 Apr 2007
Location: Drowning in a pool of blood.

PostPosted: Tue Dec 16, 2008 9:13 pm    Post subject: Battlefield: Comic #4, 'Unsafe Territory' Reply with quote

Hello there!

Battlefield, Comic #4, Unsafe Territory, is a continuation of my Battlefield comic series. Before reading this, please read the first three to get a good backround on the story:

Battlefield: Comic #1, 'Captured'
Battlefield: Comic #2, 'Interrogation'
Battlefield: Comic #3, 'War!'

I've been having some problems with the picture code and flickr, but I have finally figured this out and am posting the fourth exciting comic in the Battlefield Series!

So, may I now present,

Battlefield: Comic #4, 'Unsafe Territory!'

Starring:

Clonecommando007 as Scot/CC

DarthPineapple as Pineapple

LieutenantAntillies as Antillies

Zero1312 as Zero

Also with:

Lieutenant Brick

Corporal Mallory

Please click the picture to go to the flickr slideshow:



You can also view the Flickr Set Page Right Here!

Comments? Constructive Criticism? I would love to hear it! Please leave a reply to this thread if you'd like to voice your appreciation or give me suggestions on how I can improve.

Thank you for viewing!
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JPCJedi



Joined: 26 Jul 2005
Location: New Jersey

PostPosted: Tue Dec 16, 2008 10:25 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, your work has developed and progressed a great deal. The slideshow looks very polished, and I like the Flickr format. My only gripe is that it doesn't vary the timing for each slide, so you either have to pause it manually or speed read.

Otherwise, the story's interesting, the photography's good, and the bubbles are nicer. I'd also like to say, I love those pyramid roofs you've got on all your buildings. They add just the right amount of detail in a Town-like setting.

Maybe you could have sewn more destruction from the air attack. Dunno.
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Zombiegoo
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Joined: 03 May 2006
Location: Finland

PostPosted: Wed Dec 17, 2008 1:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very nice, I'd say. Neat story and good scenery.

As for improvements, you could always to try get rid of the date in the lower right corner of the photos. They don't really fit there.

More destruction from the air attack would indeed have been nice. Actually, you could add more destruction detritus - and pretty much of it - to every blast scene; it would improve atmosphere, I think. The explosions themselves look good, though, so there's no that large need of improving them.

And now, a kind of a SPOILER ALERT for the ones who haven't read it yet and wish not to know the ending. Wink
Nice last panel, by the way. The cliffhanger is good and I just love the way how Antillies and Pineapple are in the middle of the picture and CC is barely visible - just at the right side of the photo, considering the reading direction. Good job.
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Clonecommando007
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Joined: 13 Apr 2007
Location: Drowning in a pool of blood.

PostPosted: Wed Dec 17, 2008 9:52 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

JPCJedi wrote:
My only gripe is that it doesn't vary the timing for each slide, so you either have to pause it manually or speed read.

When I was previewing it, I also came upon that problem...What I found that I have to do is pause the whole slideshow and click next every frame, otherwise some of the text bubbles are impossible to finish reading.
Galagoo wrote:
you could always to try get rid of the date in the lower right corner of the photos.

I just recently figured out on my camera how to do that - sorry for that little glitch.

Also, I always like to end my Battlefield comics with sort of a cliffhanger or something to make the audience want to read more, that way I'm guaranteed returning readers for the sequel comics. Smile
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Zombie Fett
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Joined: 20 Jan 2008
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 18, 2008 2:45 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Good job CC007. Gave me a chuckle reading it this morning. Can't wait for the next one.
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Zombie Hawk
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Joined: 21 Mar 2007
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 18, 2008 8:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, I'm not known as Lieutenant Antilles anymore, but it's nice to see another one of these. Great work! Smile
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